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The Couples Healing podcast is a resource to help husbands in their porn addiction recovery and to help couples restore the trust and connection again in their marriage. The effects of porn addiction or sex addiction can be devastating individually and in the relationship, but with the right approach, men can learn how to stop watching porn, heal the pain it causes his wife, and rebuild trust again in the marriage. Each episode is designed to give you new insights, tools, and strategies to help you at each stage of your journey, whether you‘re just now beginning to address the addiction, or if you‘ve been struggling for many years and still feel stuck. In the podcast, I also share ways for women to feel empowered, safe, and worthy, and I share how the couple can navigate their relationship together during this difficult time. Join me, Sam Tielemans, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, as I share my expertise and knowledge to help you find freedom, peace, confidence, connection, and hope.
Episodes
13 hours ago
13 hours ago
Change is 100% if you have the right ingredients.
In today's episode, I want to introduce to you a man who has found success, and 2 years later, he continues to to do well, have a strong marriage, and help other people in their struggles with quitting porn.
This path can I often feel discouraging and depressing because most men experience countless failures and setbacks along the way.
The common thread is that men just don't know what to do to eliminate their problem, despite putting in effort and being desperate for change.
Check out this episode to see the specific things that helped Todd restore his relationship and conquer his problem.
For therapy with Sam:
I will work with you for 12 weeks to help you eliminate pornography use and the root cause that started it.
If after the 12 weeks you haven’t fully been able to quit, I’ll work with you 1-1 for free until you do.
Go to stopporn.info for more information about working with me directly.
Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction.
Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit
Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners?
Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
Thursday Apr 18, 2024
141: Why a Husband Avoids Initiating Conversations and How to Resolve It
Thursday Apr 18, 2024
Thursday Apr 18, 2024
Initiating conversations can be very difficult for a husband to do.
If his wife is in a good mood, he doesn’t want to bring up the pain all over again.
If she's in a bad mood, he doesn't want to cause a fight or make things worse.
Thus, he avoids the conversations with her and she ends up feeling unseen, unloved, and all alone.
In this episode, I share with you specific ways you can address this situation so you can have very productive conversations without fighting and create closure and connection again in the relationship.
For therapy with Sam:
I will work with you for 12 weeks to help you eliminate pornography use and the root cause that started it.
If after the 12 weeks you haven’t fully been able to quit, I’ll work with you 1-1 for free until you do.
Go to stopporn.info for more information about working with me directly.
Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction.
Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit
Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners?
Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
Thursday Apr 11, 2024
Thursday Apr 11, 2024
How do the conversations go when you talk about her pain?
Do they end with you feeling closer or further apart? Do you feel hopeless and inadequate, not knowing what to say to help her feel comforted?
For a wife, not getting the understanding and validation she needs creates hurt and anger, and the conversations just stall out leaving them both alone.
In this episode I share with you one of the main reasons why that happens and 2 things you can implement to change that dynamic.
For therapy with Sam:
I will work with you for 12 weeks to help you eliminate pornography use and the root cause that started it.
If after the 12 weeks you haven’t fully been able to quit, I’ll work with you 1-1 for free until you do.
Go to stopporn.info for more information about working with me directly.
Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction.
Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit
Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners?
Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
Thursday Apr 04, 2024
139: When a Wife Brings Up Her Husband's Lack of Follow Through
Thursday Apr 04, 2024
Thursday Apr 04, 2024
Have you ever gotten into an argument with your spouse where you're talking about specific actions that he's committed to do but then doesn't follow through?
For a wife, it can feel really frustrating if there’s a lack of follow through because she often receives that as him not being committed or caring enough.
For a husband, it can be frustrating because if he’s working on things but then feels picked apart and like his efforts aren’t enough This leads to shutting down and distance.
So in today’s episode I want to share with you how are you can both navigate this together in a way that doesn't divide you but can help you find closer and confidence that you’re healing together.
For therapy with Sam:
I will work with you for 12 weeks to help you eliminate pornography use and the root cause that started it.
If after the 12 weeks you haven’t fully been able to quit, I’ll work with you 1-1 for free until you do.
Go to stopporn.info for more information about working with me directly.
Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction.
Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit
Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners?
Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
Friday Mar 29, 2024
138: The Top 3 Ways to Kill Your Chances of Having a Strong Marriage
Friday Mar 29, 2024
Friday Mar 29, 2024
"We've been spinning our wheels for 9 months... I'm in a worst place now than the day I discovered everything."
A couple reached out to me a few hours before recording this episode. They were both discouraged and frustrated add the slow pace of the process of healing.
No matter what they did, she just felt stuck and like she couldn't move forward because some key things in their approach were missing.
In this episode I share with you the top 3 things that can cause significant damage in a relationship and prevent it from healing.
I want to share these things with you and exactly how you can reverse them so you can make progress and move forward with closure.
For therapy with Sam:
I will work with you for 12 weeks to help you eliminate pornography use and the root cause that started it.
If after the 12 weeks you haven’t fully been able to quit, I’ll work with you 1-1 for free until you do.
Go to stopporn.info for more information about working with me directly.
Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction.
Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit
Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners?
Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
Thursday Mar 21, 2024
137: How Long Does It Take to Repair A Marriage After Pornography Use?
Thursday Mar 21, 2024
Thursday Mar 21, 2024
This road to healing your marriage can be agonizing. So many people wonder how long will this take? They feel like they might not be able to hold on much longer.
The good news is that it’s actually not based on a specific timeline or a number of years. Rather it’s based on how quickly you can learn the skills that you need to have new experiences together.
Some couples can feel like they are in a completely different place in just a matter of weeks because they focus on learning the skills necessary to get them there.
What skills do you need to learn? This is what I discuss in today’s episode.
For therapy with Sam:
I will work with you for 12 weeks to help you eliminate pornography use and the root cause that started it.
If after the 12 weeks you haven’t fully been able to quit, I’ll work with you 1-1 for free until you do.
Go to stopporn.info for more information about working with me directly.
Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction.
Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit
Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners?
Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
Thursday Mar 14, 2024
136: How Long Do We Need To Keep Talking About It?
Thursday Mar 14, 2024
Thursday Mar 14, 2024
After the discovery of pornography use, it shatters the foundation of the entire relationship. Naturally, it becomes the center of most conversations as you try to resolve the issues and pain it causes.
Then after you start making some progress, many couples wonder how long they need to keep talking about things? They often tend to have the same conversations over and over again, so they wonder what the next steps are and when they can move forward without always talking about it.
In this episode, I share with you, the key indicators that you're ready to move forward and how you can find closure and resolution if you're not quite there yet.
For therapy with Sam:
Go to stopporn.info for more information about working with Sam
Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction.
Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit
Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners?
Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
Thursday Mar 07, 2024
135: She Found Out He Was Hiding A Slip… Now What?
Thursday Mar 07, 2024
Thursday Mar 07, 2024
Couples can very easily get stuck when a husband has a slip up, acts like things are normal, and then his wife finds out that he searched for something and didn’t tell her.
This can cause a wife to spiral into distrust, self protection, anger and fear all over again and it has such a big impact on the relationship and their sense of progress together.
Her wall goes up, she feels suspicious of anything he says, can’t believe anything he says.
Tune in to today's episode to get to specific things you can do to work through this situation together.
For therapy with Sam:
Go to stopporn.info for more information about working with Sam
Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction.
Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit
Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners?
Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
Thursday Feb 29, 2024
134: He Thinks He's Making Progress Helping Her Feel Safe, She Doesn't
Thursday Feb 29, 2024
Thursday Feb 29, 2024
March 18th: Join the free 5 Day 'Overcome Your Urges' Challenge to get tools to resolve the root cause of your urges so you can eliminate them instead of resisting them.
It can be very discouraging when there is a mismatch between husband and wife, and how they view their progress.
If hey husband thinks he's making strides towards creating safety and rebuilding trust, but the wife doesn't agree, it's easy to feel overwhelmed and lose hope.
This episode, I share three specific things you can do to get on the same page together with your partner and create safety.
There are some activities that move the needle more than others. So in this episode I talk about the ones that matter most so you can focus your efforts on those.
For therapy with Sam:
Go to stopporn.info for more information about working with Sam
Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction.
Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit
Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners?
Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
Thursday Feb 22, 2024
133: Narcissism and Pornography Use: Why They've Had It Wrong The Whole Time
Thursday Feb 22, 2024
Thursday Feb 22, 2024
The idea of being in a relationship with a narcissist can feel overwhelming.
After all, a “personality disorder” is a serious thing…
But what if people slinging this diagnosis have been wrong the whole time?
What if there was different a way to understand why someone engages in destructive behaviors?
In this episode, I do a deep dive in unpacking narcissism and why this label usually makes it hard for both people to make progress and change.
I share what really drives negative behaviors in a relationship and how you can actually change without needing medication or some other intervention to control symptoms.
For therapy with Sam:
Go to stopporn.info for more information about working with Sam
Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction.
Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit
Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners?
Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.